Being Available & Conflicted

I have tried before to put up a PayPal button to fans.

And received nothing.

To make it clear

This is a dire situation. And Angie I …. We just want to have food.

I have not ever been the type to be greedy. I don’t shop for expensive things.

I have most DEF have one of those lives that is just an example in endurance.

I am tired. I can’t not be a good person. I’ll never. Like turn bad.

But I question if I will make it. My father seems truly intent on being the villain of my story.

I cannot explain to you all what it means.

He has nI power over me.

Except he has this knowledge of my Achilles heel. And I years ago asked him to promise to stop using it ,,, holding me back.

He’s exploiting it.

And it’s very unfair.

The power of negative comments and never supporting you in one area that you know

JUST DIDNT EVER KNOW OR LEARN HOW TO DO IT!

Is a cruel thing to do.

Today I had woken up from taking a heavy dose of antihistamine and my Ambien late. And he called.

RULE 1. I DO NOT LIVE OR TALK TO MY FAMILY CLOSELY. people that push you away when you aren’t the issue need help

So I started to talk. I was so drowsy. But relaxed. You know wgy?

He apologized to me. Yesterday. And I decided to let him think about it.

I forgive him always. I can’t not ever not forgive my parents it’s a sin

But daddy needs the upper hand.

I was glad he called. So I was actually relaxed. I spoke in my NORMAL TONE

then he said it.

Are you on drugs.

I RAN FOR ANGIE.

Daddy wtf are you

You sound totally strung out

What????

Mr. Nagle Monroe has been sleeping

Why is she sleeping at .4pm nyc time .!!!#

BECAUSE YOUR DAUGHTER OCCASIONALLY –

Ladies and gentlemen my father.

Totally in denial I’ve been in deteriorating health since my childhood. Has no idea why the govt pays angie

No clue what’s going on in nyc.

And will not GIVE ME FOOD MONEY.

HE CALLED ME A FAILURE

oh. No lol that shit tickles.

It’s the not being able to pay rent. He just negates me so badly

Until I realized it’s my agoraphobia. I wasn’t going ti go get the money orders

Since Angie arrived I’ve been out 2 x a week.

Still corona free as I am trained to not get sick.

So I’m offering by the size or regularity of donation.

You like my site?

Well

There’s a secret one…..

Want the keys?????

If you decide to comment please be respectful

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s